Herb Batter Bread

What’s your favorite tongue twister? I’m a fan of the “One Smart Fellow” classic: One smart fellow, he felt smart. Two smart fellows, they felt smart. Three smart fellows, they felt smart. (Sheesh, that’s even hard to type!) Then there’s my husband’s favorite: One-one was a racehorse. Two-two was one, too. One-one won one race. Two-two won one, too. Tongue twisters pretty much guarantee laughs (though I try to stay away from the more dangerous ones, like the one about the fig plucker…). When I taught German years ago, I would start first day of the semester with an icebreaker: the students had to practice saying German Zungenbrecher (“tongue breakers”) like Brautkleid bleibt Brautkleid und Blaukraut bleibt Blaukraut. Hilarious, right? ….right?

The reason I bring all this up is that the other day I made this tasty Herb Batter Bread, and every time I think about it, I think of the old Betty Batter tongue twister. Come to find out (thanks, Wikipedia) the original verse was published in 1899 in The Jungle Book and read as follows:

Betty Botter bought some butter;”But,” said she, “this butter’s bitter!If I put it in my batterIt will make my batter bitter.But a bit of better butterWill but make my batter better.”Then she bought a bit of butterBetter than the bitter butter,Made her bitter batter better.So ´twas better Betty Botterbought a bit of better butter.

Thankfully, this delicious bread is much easier on your tongue than articulating Betty Botter’s butter mishaps. (Get it together, Betty Botter!) And incidentally, it’s not bitter AND delicious with butter. As someone who doesn’t own a bread machine, I’m always thrilled when I find a loaf bread that doesn’t require bread flour and can be whipped up quickly without kneading and proofing and punching and whatever else you’re supposed to do to most yeast breads. And it’s wonderfully versatile–the fresh herbs make it a lovely accompaniment to a homestyle soup, a unique choice for a sandwich, or a breakfast simply toasted with butter. I guess what I’m trying to say is:

It’s sumptuous served on a sandwich or slurped sopping with soup

and

It’s a boon of a bread to be dotted with butter. No bitter batter in this herb batter bread–believe me, it’s better than bakery bread!

Herb Batter Bread
(Adapted from Betty Crocker’s Cookbook, Bridal Edition)

Ingredients:

2 3/4 c. all-purpose flour, divided
1 tsp. salt
1 Tbsp. sugar
1 .25 oz. package active dry yeast
1 1/4 c. warm water
2 Tbsp. olive oil
3 tsp. dried parsley
2 Tbsp. fresh rosemary (or about 3/4 tsp. dried)
1 Tbsp. fresh thyme (or about 1/2 tsp. dried)
1/2 tsp. garlic powder

Directions:

1. Grease a 9 x 5 inch loaf pan.

2. In a large bowl, combine 2 c. flour, salt, sugar, and yeast. Add in the water, olive oil, herbs, and garlic powder. Stir vigorously until thoroughly combined. Add remaining 3/4 c. flour a little bit at a time and mix until completely incorporated. Spread batter evenly in prepared pan. Cover loosely and let rise in a warm place for about 40 minutes.

2. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Bake 40-45 minutes or until loaf sounds hollow when tapped.

Chunky Cheesecake Brownies

I may have mentioned this before, but my adoration of cheesecake goes back a long way. The Cheesecake Factory is one of my favorite restaurants, and many years ago I made the (possibly ill-advised) resolution to try every kind of cheesecake on their menu. (Still haven’t made it–I keep getting stuck on Adam’s Peanut Butter Fudge Ripple. How can I choose apple when chocolate and peanut butter are being paired with cheesecake in my general vicinity?) When my husband Anthony proposed to me 10+ years ago, he did so by composing a giant cheesecake made of different slices from the Cheesecake Factory. He knew I would I would say yes, but the cheesecake didn’t hurt. I wish I had a picture of it. In fact, I wish I had a replica of it.

A year later at our wedding, the wedding cake was–you guessed it–cheesecake! My dear college roommate and baking whiz Brittany generously made chocolate and white chocolate raspberry cheesecakes for our guests, supplemented by plain ones from Costco. Thankfully, Anthony was kind enough not to shove any cheesecake up my nose during the feed-each-other-cake portion of the reception. As much as I love cheesecake, I don’t think I’d love it lodged in my nasal cavities.

All this being said, the weird thing is that I myself have never actually made a cheesecake. It all comes down to the lame excuse that I don’t own a springform pan. I know, go to Target and get a stinking springform pan, right? Well, maybe tomorrow. For today, I have these delicious chunky cheesecake brownies. Brownie + cheesecake = at least as good as a regular cheesecake, in my book, and definitely worthy of a special occasion like Valentine’s Day tomorrow! Plus, if you, like me, don’t own a springform pan (and don’t have time to go through the rigamarole of the water bath/lengthy baking time/chilling overnight of cheesecake making) you’re in luck–these can be whipped up in short order and baked in a regular old 9-inch Pyrex. Cut into squares to show off their chocolate-chunky cheesecake layer, place on a fancy serving dish, and you have a lovely dessert to serve your special someone.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Chunky Cheesecake Brownies
(Adapted from Allrecipes.com)

Ingredients:

For the cheesecake layer:

1 8-oz. package cream cheese, softened
1/4 c. sugar
1 egg
1 c. semi-sweet chocolate chips

For the brownies:

1/4 c. butter
1 c. semi-sweet chocolate chips
1/3 c. sugar
2 eggs
2/3 c. all-purpose flour
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. salt

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 9-inch square baking dish.

2. Make the cheesecake layer: mix cream cheese, sugar, and egg until thoroughly combined. Stir in 1 c. chocolate chips. Set aside.

3. Make the brownie layer: in the microwave or over a double boiler, melt butter and chocolate chips in a large bowl. Mix in sugar and eggs, then flour, baking powder, and salt until evenly blended.

4. Pour half the brownie mixture in the prepared dish. Spread the cheesecake layer on top of the brownie layer, then top with remaining brownie mixture. Swirl with a knife for a marbled effect, if desired.

5. Bake in preheated oven for 40 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.

Peanut Butter and Jelly Muffins

When I was a student at Wheaton College, our cafeteria food was consistently ranked #1 in the country by U.S. News and World Report. Rightfully so–the food was stellar, especially for a cafeteria. I remember a Southwestern salad that was to die for, and their Texas cake–well, let me just say I would go all the way to Texas to taste it again. As a celebration of maintaining its spot at the top of the list, once a year the cafeteria would host a super-fancy gourmet dinner, complete with lobster, petit fours, and ice sculptures. Yes, ice sculptures.

But I digress…

The thing I really loved best about my college cafeteria was making my own behemoth peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. In the middle of the serving area stood a cut-your-own bread station with every kind of bread under the sun. I used to hack off about a half a loaf of challah bread and slather on the chunky peanut butter and gooey jelly like it was going out of style. In a weird way, this was a declaration of independence for me. Growing up, my mom’s version of PBJ was a paper-thin layer of peanut butter and an *itty-bitty* dollop of jelly spread to its absolute limit. I don’t fault her; we grew up poor. But I always, always wanted more. So the ability to make Big Mac-sized PBJs was big news for me. And I do mean big news–I’m pretty sure these sandwiches were directly responsible for my being about 20 pounds heavier in college.

In the 10 years since graduation, I’ve definitely toned down my colossal PBJ habit, but still have a place in my heart (and my belly) for that flavor match made in heaven. Hence trying these peanut butter and jelly muffins. If you’re like me and tend to get stuck on Recipe Repeat with the same old apple/blueberry/pumpkin baked goods, this twist on the classic sandwich may be just what you need to break out of your muffin rut. They were a MAJOR hit with my kids. My 6-year-old declared them the best muffins I had ever made. And they certainly are fun with their jelly surprise in the middle. Who doesn’t like a jelly surprise?

You could go spelunking in this jelly cave

And, more to the point, who doesn’t like peanut butter and jelly?

Peanut Butter and Jelly Muffins
(Adapted from Myrecipes.com)

Ingredients:

1 c. all-purpose flour
3/4 c. whole wheat flour
1/4 c. white sugar
1/4 c. brown sugar
1 Tbsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1 1/4 c. milk
1/2 c. creamy peanut butter
2 Tbsp. applesauce
1 egg
2 Tbsp. butter, melted
1 tsp. vanilla
approx. 1/3 c. grape jelly

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

2. Combine flours, sugars, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl. Make a well in the center.

3. Combine milk, peanut butter, applesauce, egg, melted butter, and vanilla and pour into well in dry ingredients. Stir until just mixed.

4. Coat 12 muffin cups coated with cooking spray. Fill each muffin cup about halfway with batter, then place 1/2 Tbsp. jelly in the center. Cover with another generous dollop of muffin batter.

5. Bake in preheated oven about 20 minutes, or until muffin tops spring back when touched in the center.

Makes 12 muffins.

Carrot Cake

Sometimes I wonder how certain vegetables have been inducted into the Hall of Acceptable Dessert Ingredients while others stand dolefully outside the gates. Carrots and zucchini, for example, are somehow perfectly admissible in cakes and quick breads, whereas mushrooms and eggplant are not. (Then again, I can’t imagine requesting a mushroom cake for my birthday–can you? If you said yes, I’m not sure we can be friends…) I suppose with carrots, it’s their innate sweetness that makes them fit alongside butter, sugar, and flour in a cake. For zucchini, I have to dig deep. Maybe some zucchini farmer had a bumper crop and made a convincing sales pitch for grating it up and putting it in bread. And here we are in the 21st century with a National Zucchini Day on the books. (April 25th, if you were wondering.) This zucchini farmer must have been one smoooooth operator.

Although I’ve never really gotten used to the idea of zucchini in a sweet package, every year my husband requests carrot cake for his birthday and I am happy to oblige. There *may* have been a year or two when I made a box mix while he was at work and passed it off as homemade. But no longer! Now that I have my chopaholic food processor, grating 3 cups of carrots in a matter of minutes takes a major chunk of the work out of making carrot cake from scratch. (It also nearly took a major chunk out of my hand before I located the pusher that had gone missing.)

This particular recipe has been a success for me in the past, so for my husband’s birthday yesterday, I tried it again. It totally passed the test–light but moist with a hint of cinnamon sweetness and the perfect amount of rich tang in the cream cheese frosting. Definitely a winner even for those who (like me) remain somewhat skeptical about vegetables in dessert.

Just don’t ask me to try carrot pie. That’s taking the idea entirely too far.

Carrot Cake
(Adapted from Allrecipes.com)

Ingredients:

For the cake:

4 eggs
3/4 c. vegetable oil
1/2 c. applesauce
1 3/4 c. white sugar
2 tsp. vanilla extract
2 c. all-purpose flour
2 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
2 tsp. ground cinnamon
3 c. grated carrots

For the frosting:

8 oz. cream cheese, softened
1/2 c. butter, softened
4 c. powdered sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
3 Tbsp. milk

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease two 9-inch cake pans.

2. In a large bowl, beat together eggs, vegetable oil, applesauce, sugar, and vanilla. Mix in flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon. Stir in carrots. Pour into prepared pans.

3. Bake in preheated oven 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Let cool at least ten minutes in the pan, then carefully remove to a cooling rack to finish cooling.*

4. To make the frosting: in a medium bowl, combine cream cheese, butter, powdered sugar, and vanilla. Add milk a little at a time and mix until frosting consistency is to your liking. Frost cake as desired when it has cooled completely.

I ate this piece. And it was delicious.

*If you’d like to make the cake ahead of time and frost later, here’s an awesome hack: spray the inside of two freezer bags with cooking spray and place one cake layer in each. No losing the top of the cake to sticky plastic wrap!

Better-Than-Store-Bought Biscuits

Over the Christmas season, we were fortunate enough to spend quite a bit of time with my husband’s high school friends, a group they call “The Core” (which always reminds me an ’80s band or a trendy gym). Our friend Eric and his wife Christa were in town for the wedding of another Core member, and since they’re the only ones who live out of state, it’s always a good excuse to get everyone together when they’re in town. During a little dinner party at our house, somehow Christa and I ended up talking about how you can never make homemade biscuits turn out quite as delicious as the store-bought ones that come in the tube you smack with a spoon. Seriously, they’re never as good. What does Pillsbury put in those tubes that makes their biscuits come out all airy and fluffy and buttery? (Do I actually want to know?) Christa is from Alabama, which I figured meant she would have a slam-dunk biscuit recipe–don’t they eat biscuits all the time in the South? But even she agreed that store-bought always turns out best.

A week or so later I was making a turkey soup that needed some kind of accompaniment and remembered my conversation with Christa. Thus far in my life I had never made a successful biscuit. They always come out more gluten-y doorstoppers than buttery showstoppers. This time I turned to Mark Bittman’s trusty How to Cook Everything Vegetarian to see if his recipe could bring me out of my biscuit funk. And indeed it did! Any guesses for the secret ingredient that made the difference? More baking powder? The lately-super-popular coconut oil? Eye of newt?

Nope, the thing that made the difference was none other than that most versatile of dairy products: yogurt. (Wish I had known this when I wrote about unexpected uses for Greek yogurt.) Then again, the use of the food processor may have also made a difference–though even Mark Bittman says it’s the yogurt. These came out light, buttery, and yes, even fluffy! With the addition of some fresh herbs, they made for a hearty sidekick to turkey soup–and from now on, I’m sure I’ll be using them to accompany many other dishes, because they actually were…

better than store-bought!

Better-Than-Store-Bought Biscuits
(Adapted from How to Cook Everything Vegetarian by Mark Bittman)

Ingredients:

2 c. all-purpose or cake flour
3/4 tsp. salt
1 Tbsp. baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. dried herbs, such as rosemary or thyme (optional)
4 Tbsp. butter
7/8 c. yogurt
3 Tbsp. milk

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 450 degrees.

2. Mix the dry ingredients in the bowl of a food processor. Cut the butter into small pieces and pulse it in the food processor until thoroughly blended.

3. Transfer mixture to a large bowl. Stir in the yogurt and milk and form dough into a ball. Turn the dough out onto a lightly floured surface and knead it 10 times.

4. Press the dough to a 3/4 inch thickness and cut into 2-inch rounds with a biscuit cutter or open end of a glass. Gently reshape the leftover dough and cut again. Place the rounds on an ungreased baking sheet. Bake 9-10 minutes or until biscuits are golden brown.

Makes about 10 biscuits.